I Will Follow

Wow, why did I do this? LOL I don't even know, I just wanted to try writing a poem with pen, and on a paper. Too bad, my handwriting is so screwed up, but I honestly has predicted this. Say that I just wrote it on my book because I need a photograph for this post. LOL.

This poem alone is inspired by my conversation yesterday with my girl. We were talking about many things like personally, when we were walking from a mall to another. She was kind of inspiring me when she talked about 'following where the heart goes'. About not to lie to ourselves and go where our hearts lead us to. So, I end up writing this poem.

For I don't know how many times

I am trapped in your invitation

Who can stand looking at you standing there

While touching you is all I always want to do?

You're such a cold ice mountain

Hard to break like a solid wall of stone

Who am I to be inside your world

While I'm not even strong enough to knock on your door?

But I quit running from myself

I stop wondering what to do or I should do

Where my heart goes I will follow

Where my hands touch I will go

Where my body lays I will stay

And it's all going towards you

You're a reality better than my every dream

The one that keeps me fall to the ground

Let me in, let me in, let me be inside you

For I'm the only one in this world to handle you

There it is. Love it? Hate it? I alone am not too confident with that since I wrote less words than usually. But it's written, and there it is.

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Time is Up

I had funny conversation with my friends in WhatsApp chat group. So, one of my girls finally got a boyfriend last Friday night, then she told us in Saturday. In that chat, one of my boys acted as if he was jealous that this girl finally dates somebody and said he has composed song lyrics for that moment, but he hasn't made the music. I challenged him to upload his lyrics to the chat bar so that I could write a poem to reply it. He did it, we all read it and like touched because the lyrics were about losing someone to someone else and the subject ends up regret everything. It contains of some unusual words, that is why I really respect my friend for being some kinda talented.

Then I wrote a poem for the reply, which did not even take more than 10 minutes. The reply itself is about someone who has fought for the one she/he loved but failed because this beloved one did not let her/him in, so she/he gave up and told the beloved one not to search for her/him because she/he had decided to be with someone else.  

I don't know whether this is talent or what, but I guess it's not. Because I actually just re-used some words I have put in my previous poem, Farewell Rhyme, for the main idea is pretty much similar. LOL I know this is bad, not creative in other words. Ugh but like I care, I somehow like this poem. Its title is Time is Up, I really had no idea of others.

I spent ♏y lifetime for yőυ
Sailed with this broken ship
Just so that I can reach yoυя shore
And make ♏y own paradise

I spread ♏y wings and flown high
So high to reach yoυя sky
I believed heaven was there
Right in yoυя arms that I dreamed of

But the waves hit ♏y ship
The shore I saw was getting further
Lightning stroke ♏y wings
And they were torn into two
Yoυя sky was getting higher
While ♏y heart crashed the ground

Breaking yoυя wall takes a hard work
Opening yoυя door needs patience
While waiting for yőυ is nonsense
For yőυ never ever let mξ in

♏y time is up, I can't wait any longer
I see how wε're not meant to be
So I throw ♏y hopes away
To find a light that leads mξ

Don't come back to find mξ
I am nowhere for yőυ now
I have decided to live ♏y own path
The way yőυ live in yoυя world

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Farewell Rhyme

Yesterday I was waiting for my friends to go to a wedding together but I came too early while they were late. Because I had no idea where to go, I went to the ladies toilet and sat on the washing stand. There, I listened to songs from Touchy, my iPod Touch, while I was chatting with Plurkers in Whatsapp, using Torchy, my white Blackberry Torch.  

Actually, yesterday was a 'moment' for me. I realized finally that I wanted something that I am not required to reach. Something that only takes an extraordinary person to have, whom is not me. I lost faith in myself right when I recalled every moment of myself trying to reach out. I can't go on anymore. This one thing is too hard. This is an unsolved math equation. Uncompounded puzzle pieces. While I always failed working on equations and puzzles because I don't like them. So, I decide to let go. I say goodbye, but I don't release it with hate. The problem is in both of me and that thing, not in something that connects us. I don't blame anyone for this. I just say goodbye, that is.

And to celebrate the moment, I got a haircut too. But before it, when I was sitting on the washing stand, I wrote a poem. I was some kind of inspired by Owl City's Lonely Lullaby and Dia Frampton's Inventing Shadows. Here it is.

I put back the book to the shelf
'Cause I can't find the key to unlock it
I change ♏y sailing direction
'Cause the wave resists ♏y ship

It takes a strong pouring rain
To break a cold solid stone
It takes a heart that never give in
To fight so hard and open the door

I am not good enough for yőυ
I fail to find yoυя key
I am unable to reach yoυя shore
I can't break yoυя wall of bricks
Not required to open yoυя gate
Goodbye I say to yoυя paradise

Yőυ stand there alone with yourself
Comfortable with loneliness
Never let anyone come in
Nobody can enter yoυя world

But yoυя beauty is truly pure
Yőυ're the realest thing I wanted
Better than every dream of mine
That I loved for what yőυ are

I hope that yőυ find happiness
With what yőυ are or what yőυ'll be
I am here praying for yőυ
As a friend that yőυ can call true

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A Book I Want to Read

Phewwwwww...finally, after waited for so long, this poem was successfully composed! Seriously, since 2 weeks ago, when I held a long conversation with my friends, which was a serious one, I have always been thinking about an idea to write this poem.

I was 'judged' (not in a bad term) that I notice a man by his look. I did not deny it, because I am kinda like that. When I was attracted to his look, I would want to know his inside and I will learn to love it, either it's naturally or by mean. I'm not a kind of girl who can let anyone inside, I don't even like being one-sided approached. I like it when a man I love approaches me, but I want to approach him too, so that he knows that I feel the same. I'm a kind of person who believes that there's nothing in this world that we can get without hard work.

 

 

So, this is it. I simply titled this poem 'Book' because I probably don't like a long title lately. And since I also think the title 'Book' has said it all, from the first time the subject found 'him' in a beautiful cover, that she brings him everywhere, until herself who patiently waits until he wants to open the chapter and let her in. Love it? Hate it? Tell me anything!

You are a kind of book
That I will gladly read
I found you in a bookshelf
In a wide library I recognize

You are nothing but attractive
Tempting me with that beauty
Your cover page makes me believe
That I will love you unconditionally

Today I may haven't fallen yet
But I must bring you everywhere
So the world knows you are mine
So no one can steal you from me
Until you open the first chapter
Let me read and love you forever

You're too real to be in my dream
So close that I can hold you
In a space I call reality
You are my wish comes true

No one else can be your owner
You belong to me ever after
We'll shine and complete each other
Compared to star, we'll be brighter

This could be impossible
But I can't stop all these steps
Giving up on you, I'm unable

Since I feel like told, you need my caress

Please open up and love me
Show me how to reach your ending
I will wait even if it takes my life
For you, the one for me

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Favor

Sometimes in life, not everything can go the way you expect. When you do good things, help people for example, doesn't mean they will always like it. Doesn't mean that you will always be appreciated. Mind the time, mind what matters, mind whether you are asked or not. Because if you don't, you'll end up bullying someone with your favor. 

And this poem is for you who had bullied me by helping me. Thanks to you, the heaven now becomes hell for me. But I won't leave because I want to watch you leave.

Thought yőυ were a friend
That I can always count on
Someone I had to depend
But now those days are gone

There's no such sweet thing no more
Since I knew yőυ're just a stranger
Who cuts ♏y ways like a terror
As yőυ freeze ♏y heart colder

It's not a favor, it's a torture
I know yőυ Ľovε to see mξ cry
Yőυ don't help mξ, yőυ just drain mξ
I feel yoυя laughter while I bleed
But I will stay strong and hold on
Cause I know it's yőυ who'll leave

I wonder where I went wrong
And why yőυ always bring mξ down
As if I'm never around
Like I can't scream any sound

Yőυ make mξ hate to see this place
But this is where I belong
♏y decision is to stay here
To see yőυ someday disappear

Never will I lose to yőυ
No matter what yőυ steal from mξ
Until yőυ see mξ above yoυя head
Where yoυя hands couldn't reach mξ

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